neri’s blog

outback...

just turned 29 the other day... whew!!! am i that old? i prefer not to answer... and i prefer to say the latter one because it means getting old in maturity...when i was still in school, i always wanted to celebrate my birthdays during school days... i always thought it could be happier if i celebrated it with my friends during school...  you see, my birthday falls on summer meaning, no school... only my neighboor friends were with me then.  unluckily, i am not used to celebrating it with a party or clowns or cakes.  my parents cannot afford that... i can only remember celebrating my 18th birthday with only closest friends and relatives... i had a choice then to have a party but opted not to. i told my parents, there were still more important things to spend the money with... thinking of that now made me think that it was the first time i had a birthday cake...funny noh...

with nicole...

In this day and age, celebrating birthdays, for me, is spending it with the one you love the most.  As simple as that.  One may have an extravagant party, plenty of visitors you cannot even talk to them one by one, friends who went there to make "chikas" to friends of friends,... i don't know.. i don't really like that kind of thing...i prefer an intimate gathering of those people who really touch your lives everyday... because at the end of the day, they're the one who really matters to you, right?

my world...

i don't like to hear, "how old are you?" it is better if one says, "You're all grown up now."  it is more appreciating... more pleasant to hear...

i really miss home...when i say home, i mean san pedro 2 malvar batangas... that's where i came from... maybe some of you don't even know it exists... but yes, it really does exists...where everything is so simple...probinsyang probinsya... pag andun ako, i can be me... i can shout for as loud as i want.  alam nyo bang ang mga tao sa batangas, kahit magkakaharap o magkatabi lang, nagsisigawan... hehehe... ang lalakas ng boses... ganyang kaming mga batangueña/batangueño...hindi dahil nag-aaway kami, it is our nature...

Election day. i went home to cast my vote there.  i am not yet registered here in parañaque, that's why... so pagdating ko dun, sabi ko sa pinsan ko, sabay na kami bumoto...when i get there, i was surprised that there were only few people there giving away leaflets with the names of the candidates.. it is just then that i learned, bawal na pala un... bawal daw pero meron pa rin.. ang tigas talaga ng ulo no... but compared to the 2004 elections, konti na nga lang naman... so before getting to the precint, i had a handful of flyers ng mga candidates na hindi ko kilala, who the hell are these people? i don't know them tapos iboboto ko... so tita ynlen introduced them to me, one by one...so ito, anak ni ganyan ung kandidato dati na pinsan ni kuwan na kandidato din....ito naman asawa ni ano na inaanak ni tatay ko.. iboto mo ha... hahaha.. ano ba un... only then i told myself.... ah ok, now i know who will i vote for... in god's grace, nakumpleto ko naman... sayang din ang isang boto ko, every vote counts, ika nga...as of this writing, leading naman ung mga ibinoto ko...

nakakatuwa lang or minsan nakakagulat din, na ang dami ko na ring hindi kilala sa amin... the young ones then, i cannot recognize them anymore now... how they grew up so fast?... sabi nga, mga dalaga't binata na sila... some of them even greeted me and they were asking me how am i doing? nakakatuwa... ung iba, after talking to them, i asked tita ynlen, si ano na ba un? ang laki na ah, di ko na sila makilala... at least kilala pa rin nila ako...hehehe...

so after voting, i went back to visit my brothers and sisters (ulila na po kasi kami e) meron na ring kanya kanyang pamilya... kwentuhan to the max na naman... i go there once a month, i always make sure to go there talaga once in a while... hindi kasi pwedeng weekly kasi mahal ang gas... siempre kasama si nicole.. but this time, i didn't bring her, kasi delikado nga naman, baka magkagulo e election pa naman... parang walang katapusang kwento, balita dito balita doon. ako naman, basta andun, tanong ako ng tanong kung ano ng nangyayari sa munti naming baryo... nagulat lang ako sa nangyari sa school ko nung elementary kasi sobrang luma na talaga, as in, sira sira na ung mga pinto, ung mga desks sobrang lumal na... ung playground namin nun, wala ng damo... as in parang isolated place na... sus naman, ung school na un, dun pa nag-aral ung mga nanay ko, actually silang lahat magkakapatid...ung oldest nila is 67 years old na, so more than 60 years old na ung school.. imagine... ilang henerasyon na ang dumaan dun...pero nawa din ako kasi in as much as i want to help, i don't have resources... buti na lang, somebody from the government offered to help renovate the school.. so far, nagstart na ayusin, sana lang tuloy tuloy na...

haayyyy...sarap talaga magbalik tanaw... sobrang nakakamiss... nakakamiss ung simpleng buhay sa probinsya... kung saan ung mga pagkain mo, gulay at isda, masayang masaya ka na... hindi masyadong uso ang karne, kung meron man, galing din sa mga alaga nila...kalabasa, sitaw, kamatis at kung ano ano pang iba, pipitasin mo na lang sa likod bahay mo...wala ka nang gagastusin masyado...ung pangluto mo ay ung mga kahoy na kinuha lang sa tabi tabi... ganun kasimple.. hindi tulad dito sa maynila, ultimong dahon ng sili, bibilhin mo pa...pero civilized na rin naman sila, may cable at internet na rin naman dun.. baka akalain ng iba e, takot sa tao ung mga taga doon...sabi nga sa amin, "umaabot pa rin naman ng buo ung yelo (ice) dun... hehehe...sementado na rin ang mga kalsada don... hahaha...

nga pala...alam nyo bang sa amin, may iba't ibang tawag sa lahat ng klase ng langgam... alam nyo ba kung ano galtang? hantik-apoy? kwitib? mga klase ng guyam yan... ang tawag sa amin sa langgam, guyam... malamang hindi alam ng karamihan un... only in batangas yata un e...hahahaha...oh well, at maraming iba pa na kami lang sigurong mga taga batangas ang nagkakaintindihan...

naku, sobrang haba na pala nito... masyado akong nadala ng aking emosyon... sana hindi mainip o mabore ung magbabasa nito... dito lang kasi ako nakakapaglabas ng iba't ibang klaseng emosyon e...makapamilya kasing akong tao e.. when it comes to my family, i am very emotional... blame it to being the bunso...

haloo baloo...

i have been very busy these past months...with some additions to my duties and responsibilities and so much things to do. still managed to visit the net once in a while. lucky me for having unlimited access to the internet in and out of work...    i still can do so much...well, what's up now?

the first few months of the year was the most challenging time for me... but i think, i just have to be a little more of a wife than of a mother... maybe i'm focusing too much on nicole that's why i am unconsiously neglecting my responsibilities as a wife to him.  slowly, we're recovering from that painful experience that even in my wildest dream could have happened.. again and again.. and AGAIN... yes, it happened three times...same situation... stupid me? no, i just believe in the sanctity of marriage... i also believe those times really do happen... that once in a while, we commit mistakes that we're not aware we're already hurting those people who loves us.  believe me, not all marriages are perfect, we all have to go through this kind of experiences in life so it could make the bond stronger.  i just realized one thing... i only have to trust him, whatever happens.  with nicole in tow, i can never go wrong... she is my life...she is so adorable... the joy of our lives...

off topic... did it ever happen to you that you while you were driving, not everyday but sometimes there will be some bully drivers that will scare you to death? about a week ago, i was terrified when there was this white car chased us just because we overtook him on our way home.  nikki was driving his usual 40kph when we noticed that this car in front of us won't let us passed through him... i didn't know what he was doing then but he was driving really slow...so nikki decided to overtake.. then all of a sudden, he just flashed his bright lights and kept on pushing the horn and chased us.  the first few minutes, i was ok but then he didn't stop.  he was just driving behind us. we even stopped after a hump to know what he will do next but then he didn't want to overtake.  i knew then that he wasn't happy for what we did but we didn't do any wrong. we just overtook his car since he was moving super slow. so i said, "nikki, he's really following us, what shall we do?" nikki shook off his head, " i don't know." I said while crying, let me go down when we reached the house but the white CRV blocked the driveway, opened his window and cursed us.  I was terrified and scared that i wasn't not able to go down because i don't know what he could have done to us if i went down. so nikki got back to the steering wheel and turn around away from the house again and let the CRV chased us...i called my parents-in-law for help and advised us to go to church since it is a crowded place but i told nikki to just go back to the house, whatever happens we're home. finally, we reached the house, ran inside, and let them spoke to the guy who happened to be a foreigner and a resident also of the village. i didn't even noticed how i was able to get inside because i was really really scared. that moment, nicole was waiting for us upstairs and i wasn't able to get her and just sat down. 

when everything went back to normal, i told nikki things what i have been telling him everyday.. that he should be careful on the street...keep himself safe at all times coz nobody knows what might happen to him.  remember the loyola incident? it was just a parking arguement.  who knows, the people in the car right next to you holds a gun and just shoot you, what will happen? it's just a matter of road discipline...

and just last friday, we met an accident again... involving a motorcycle... goodness gracious... we were on our way home, AGAIN... then there's this man who forced his motorcycle to go through between our car and the jeepney that was unloading on the other side of the street and then booommmm. he hit us, the side mirror was broken and we had flat tire. we weren't able to get the plate no. because the motorcycle flew so fast that even the barangay tanods weren't able to catch him. poor us.  good thing there were good samaritans that helped us.  what a day!!!

and so again, i reminded nikki to be careful and be safe always and hold his temper.  Don't be so rude on the street. don't just think of his egoistic self but think of us who loves him so much.  He is like that but i came to accept that he is what he is.  i can only remind him of these things and think of the people who loves him. ALWAYS. 

and i also say these to everybody. be safe!!! always....

my very first vox blog....what am i suppose to write...well... nothing much....as it is a monday and have a handful of things to do. 

il be back some other time.. have to finish so much papers on my table....

next time....